Let's Talk About Your Decision...
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Pastor David Winston on -
"One decision I am faced with is having my significant other spend the night with me sometime..."
-Anonymous
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Permalink Reply by Pastor David Winston on
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First, I want to start to answer this question by asking us think about this with more of the mindset of "Is this the wise thing for me to do?"...and less of the mindset of "Is this right or wrong?"...However, I will give you an answer. My answer will be based on the Word of God and I too have had this question in the past...
Eph.5:15 Says "walk circumspectly (cautiously), not as fools, but as wise"
1 Peter 5:8 says "Be sober and vigilant because the devil roams about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour"
First, theses two scriptures tell me a lot. I am to be cautious and wise - one of the definitions of wisdom is good judgement - so I must use good judgement. Next, the devil is seeking whom he may devour - meaning he's not just capturing anybody, he is looking for someone specific. He is looking to devour those who are NOT sober of mind and who are NOT being cautious or watchful. So if we are NOT cautious, we are a target for the devil - and do you know who those people are??...Those are the people that put themselves in the midst of TEMPTATION.
Eph. 4:27 says in the Amplified Bible "Leave no room or foothold for the devil...give no opportunity to him"
So my first thought is, that is an opportunity for the devil to try and tempt you into sexually immoral behavior. Even if it is said that you have never had the thought before, who's to say that thought won't eventually come if the devil is continuously given the opportunity! The decision to have a girlfriend/boyfriend spend the night with you sounds like a setup and trap from the enemy...I would steer clear of this. We never want to willingly give the devil an opportunity to tempt us because we have to ability then to mess up.
Finally, 1 Timothy 4:12 says "...set an example for believers in lifestyle and purity" - furthermore, you don't want to make anyone stumbe or question your behavior as you live a life according to the Word of God.
For example, as a male leader in ministry, a married man, and a youth pastor, I will NOT be in the car alone with another woman or female youth...NOT because I feel like something sexually immoral might happen, but because I don't want to leave any part of my lifestyle open to questions. If someone sees me in the car with a young female (that is not my wife), they might begin to question what my behavior is. So I want to avoid the appearance of any wrongdoing, even if I was not doing anything wrong.
Simply put, the PRINCIPLE OF THE PATH says "Your direction, NOT intention, will bring you to a destination." Some teens who want to stay sexually pure until marriage didn't INTEND to have sex and get pregnant, but the direction of the decisions they made brought them to a different destination, which was not the destination of purity.
So here is the BIG QUESTION:
If you choose to have your girlfriend/boyfriend sleepover, HOW IS YOUR DIRECTION ANY DIFFERENT THAN THE DIRECTION OF SOMEONE WHO IS GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH THEIR GF/BF LATE THAT NIGHT IN THE BEDROOM OF THEIR HOUSE?
...Let me tell you, it's not. And you will get the same result (sexual impurity) as this other couple. Stay away from opportunities of temptation, and you won't have to repent later! It's that simple.
~Pastor David
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Permalink Reply by Ademola Akindele on -
I think that's an honest question. I agree with Pastor David. It's better not to see temptation than to fight it. As it is not about passing any test, in this situation, it's about staying pure.
Aa
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Permalink Reply by Dion Trevall Gibson on -
This is a decision that i have made. I have dated someone for 3 months but i ended the realationship, because she wasn't as passionate about God as i am, but what really pushed me to do so was when she said she didn't agree with the entire bible and that shook me because around that time my faith was alittle shaken. I would have probably stayed with if she didn't say that. Did I make the right choice?
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Permalink Reply by Pastor David Winston on
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I would say YES Dion you made the right choice, because you want to ultimately be with someone who will encourage you in your faith in God, and not discourage you. If her trust in the Bible was not solid, then her trust in God was not solid since God and His Word are one (John 1:1).
When you are dating someone (especially long term), you are around them a lot, and you will begin to find yourself taking on their characteristics or their beliefs - even if you didn't initially believe those opposing beliefs. That's the reason why the Word says don't be UNequally with unbelievers (2 Cor. 6:14). Now I am in no way condemning her or calling her an "unbeliever". But her not agreeing with the Bible would make me question her belief system. We just have to pray and believe that the Holy Spirt will work on her to help her understand and accept the WHOLE revelation of the Word. But you did make the right decision bro!
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Permalink Reply by Dion Trevall Gibson on
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Thanks Pastor
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Permalink Reply by Gloria Hernandez on -
How can i make a wise decision haven't been doing that at all. How can you help me by making a wise decision making so that i want make that wrong decision making.
from:gloria
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Permalink Reply by Dion Trevall Gibson on
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Gloria. It starts with involving God of course and of you making the decesion to start making wise decisions in your heart and mind. Change your mind about how you have been doing things and come to a different approach. You might wanna read the scriptures on the 10 steps to make wise decisions that pastor has posted. Random note: Can't wait Pastor Bill Winston to come to my church in august.
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Permalink Reply by Pastor David Winston on
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"What does God think about me joining a Sorority or Fraternity?"
-Anonymous
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Permalink Reply by Pastor David Winston on
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In response to this question, first I must go back to step #3 of our 10 STEPS to Making a Wise Decision – “Does it bring glory & honor to God? (1 Corinthians 10:31).”
Our first desire is always to serve God…but that doesn’t mean that you can enjoy some of the things that you like to do (such as hobbies). You just must make sure that they are not in violation of the Word or God’s will. Sororities and Fraternities are an interesting topic of discussion from a Christian perspective. I understand that they have Christian Sororities /Fraternities as well, and not all the different S/F (Sororities / Fraternities) represent the same things. I will start off by saying I have not been apart of any fraternities, but I know enough to speak knowledgeably.
The Word of God is the primary authority here. In addition, you should RESEARCH what the S/F stands for and what they value. What are they based in and what do they believe in? They call each other “sister” or “brother”…so find out what kind of people you are going to be establishing a close relationship with. What does this S/F life entail or require? Because some S/F require you to take an oath, you should be careful what you are vowing to do or say. (Leviticus 5:4, James 5:12)
Now let’s look inside of you. The first question is why would you want to join a S/F? #2: What are your motives? (Proverbs 20:27 NLT) – Motives are important to God. If someone wants to be in a S/F because they have great parties, that is a wrong motive and they should not choose to take part in it. (1 Peter 4:3).
Do you want to be apart of this S/F for status and popularity? Well if this was the case, the motive would be based on pride, which God hates (Proverbs 8:13).
This may not be your situation or feeling, but I am just presenting some things for you to think about.
Although we are commanded to love all people (1 John 4:7-8), it is not beneficial to our Christian walk to have our closest , most intimate relationships be with those who are unbelievers (1 Corinthians 15:33). This is not to bring any condemnation onto those who may have already joined an S/F, but this is simply meant to give you some insight in understanding what God’s will is. Remember, God has called you to be set apart – not blend in (1 Peter 2:9-10). So your lifestyle and decisions must reflect who you represent, unashamedly Jesus.
There are a lot of variables, so I would not be so foolish as to tell you what to do without knowing more facts. I will say that you should be promoting God and choosing His will for your life in whatever you do! Let the Holy Spirit be your guide and teacher. Go HARD!!
**Great resource for understanding: www.GotQuestions.org
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Permalink Reply by morgan lashawn williams on -
i get tired of having a conversation and ending up slipping out foul language, because once im done talking i realize how i didnt notice i was cursing, im tired of doing it and turning around and repenting, i wana stop completely i mean how would i look if im cursing then telling people about God? do you have anything for this?
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Permalink Reply by Dion Trevall Gibson on
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For whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. Galatians 6:7 KJV What are you exposing yourself to? I had a similar situation with cursing and what not. Then i believe, God gave me discernment of what was causing me to indulge in foul language which was associating with people who use foul language. Rather it would be on the internet or in public and indulging in violent video games that caused me to use foul language, and having a contrary desire to be cool with people who used bad language. But my point is ask God to give you discernment of any causes of foul language and when you act on it it will help you to futher renew your mind by faith in Christ. May this be of help to you in the name of Jesus Christ.
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